Help!

A year ago me and my depression made really good friends :) Yey!

However, I want to break up...

Being a poor student I can't really afford any professional help, so I just e-mailed all my problems to some International Counseling Center online which is supposed to help poor foreigners struggling with life in Paris FOR FREE. I love everything that's for free.

Here's my e-mail: (I just added some censorship cause you know, it's more or less a private thing...)

Hello,

I’m so happy I found this website.

It’s been * **** since I’m in ***** and it seems it’s all getting just ***** and *****…

It all started when I ***** this ***** ********* and suffered from ****** ***** for ***** months, till finally I managed to ******, then found out I was ******** and had an ********. The decision about ******** was the hardest one ever in my life and I can’t stop ****** ****** ***** it. Since then I just can’t find ******** in my **** again. Even though I’m now with ******* *********, who I **** very much and he ***** me too, I keep on ****** every day, I ****** from **** ******* every few hours, I have **********. I became very ******** and find ************* very difficult for me. It has never been like this before. I would **** ******* easily, but now it’s been a year since I ***** **** only ******, speaking only to my *********. I never ** ***, I never **** ******. I feel a huge lack of *************. It drives me crazy. In the **** I feel like in a ******, but at the same time I don’t want ** ***. Especially if I’ve been ****** all day beforehand. Another difficulty is that I don’t ***** ******. I mean, I know ******* and basic ************ but I just can’t get started. Everything that’s ****** remind me of *** ******** (the **** *********, ***** and finally ********). I’m kinda afraid of ***** now, so I try to ***** them. I also have these **** ******* ****** when I get **********, ***, *****, sometimes ***** ****** **** and so on. Another problem is my ****** of ******** on *****. This makes my ***** **** very complicated, especially ******** for a *** (where you need to make ***** **********), calling *********** for a ***** of ******. I don’t even **** with my ****** on *****. And finally, I don’t know if that’s a serious issue, but whenever I **** that everything’s *********** I just *** ******** ******* of ******, *********, ********, etc. Afterwards this makes me **** even *****, but I ****** it ***** and *****. All in all, I just don’t feel there’s *** ***** in ** ****…

Thank you in advance!